Author Archive

Time to oil up!

March 10, 2010

Capcom have finally unveiled their final character to join Super Street Fighter IV!

His name is Hakan. He looks rather amusing…like the love child of Blanka, Urien and Zangief.

I’d totally play Bayonetta if……..

March 9, 2010

it looked like this! Junkboy did a nice mock up of Bayonetta if it was an arcade shmup. That’s shoot-em-up for the uneducated. Pew pew pew!

Bullseye!

March 1, 2010

Destructoid’s Jim Sterling recently wrote a piece on why Deadly Premonition is better than Heavy Rain. This snippet sums up it up nicely, and for once I can’t argue.

“Twenty dollars for a twenty hour game full of hilarity, versus sixty dollars for a six hour game full of Quantic Dream creaming its jeans over how clever it is. You do the math! Actually, no, I’ll do the math for you because you’re probably a PS3 fanboy and hence a fucking idiot. The math is that Deadly Premonition is better and that you’re a cunt. That is the math.”

I salute you sir.

Fishing Hero. Make it happen.

February 25, 2010

In Deadly Premonition, you play a homicide detective. After killing hordes of creepy zombies and muttering “nice!” or “yes!”, what can you do to unwind? Go fishing of course!

Hype alert.

SNK have announced The King of Fighters EX EYE EYE EYE. That’s thirteen.

I recently bought KOF EX EYE EYE (twelve) despite it’s poor reviews because I was bored at work. So, no story. No boss. Ultra laggy online play…why am I still excited for KOF 13? The sad fact is that I’m one of those SNK loyalists. Ugh. Some work just landed on my desk. Literally.

Laterz!

Last week’s UK Top 10 Videogames. Scores*

February 22, 2010

"Fifa 10 Boxart"

Notice that I’ve used the full range of 1-10 in these scores.

1. Bioshock 2 (PC/PS3/360). Score  6/10 – lacking in originality.

2. Just Dance (Wii). Score 1/10 – No Davina on cover art.

3. Fifa 10 (PS3/360/PSP/Wii). Score 3/10 – Why is there a Gears of War locust on the cover?

4. Modern Warfare 2 (PS3/360/PC). Score 9/10 – Because.

5. Wii Sports Resort (Wii). Score  7/10 – No Gamecube controller support.

6. New Super Mario Bros (Wii). Score 2/10 – Its not really new.

7. Wii Fit Plus (Wii). Score 10/10 – The detective is the killer.

8.  Mass Effect 2 (PC/360). Score 8/10 – Title is misleading, there’s no church-going in this.

9. Dante’s Inferno (PS3/360). Score 5/10 – No DS port.

10. Bayonetta (PS3/360).  Score 4/10 – Graphics on 360 were too good.

* I don’t even need to play games to review them. I guarantee most reviewers don’t**

**More lies

A free game that I would certainly pay for, possibly.

February 20, 2010

BEHOLD : CREAM WOLF

tip : click the link

No its not that sort of cream, you filthy pervert.

I know you have the attention span of a magpie in a jewellery shop sporting disco lights, but do sit through the tedious commercial & the short tutorials.

Credit to Destructoid for showcasing this gem…I agree with them that explaining this game would spoil a fair amount of the novelty… so go play it.

February 12, 2010


OMG OMG OMG

TWENTY TEN’S DAY-ONE OH-EM-GEE PURCHASES

February 7, 2010

It’s nearly the new year and I’m looking forward to wasting some money on new games! Yeah smartass, I know its February – I’m talking about Chinese New Year.  (Easily in top 10 best excuses for not posting this in January!)

Lets cut to the chase!

STUPID BUG

  • Lost Planet 2. Giant robots. Snow pirates. Snow pirates in the sand. Giant bugs that half make sense (Fuck you new Star Trek). Oh and snow pirates in space. With giant robots.
  • Battlefield Bad Company 2. Like Modern Warfare 2, but MORE! Just one segment of a standard BF map could hold a MW2 stage. Heck, I also managed to get a cheap preorder deal from Amazon You-kay, so hurrah.
  • Halo Reach. Yeah. I’m hyped.

INSTANT CLASSIC

Only these three games possess sufficient levels of hype-power to make me buy them upon release. Stay tuned for another pointless list in the very near future. You know you love them. Heck, I might even revise this one.